Gender Gender

When will we learn that violence does not pay?

Speak Out on Violence with DORIS KASOTE
LATELY, women have made headlines for the wrong reasons; allegedly being violent towards their partners. These situations have in some cases resulted in death.
However, I shall not dwell on that because some cases are still under investigation while others are before the courts of law.
I have wondered why a person cannot walk out of a relationship or a marriage when they feel they have been pushed against the wall.
While doing hair in a salon two weeks ago, some women complained how some men mistreat their partners and that such women feel compelled to react by being violent towards their spouses.
With no remorse, a particular woman narrated how she did not take any nonsense from her husband. She said whenever he returned home late; she denied him food and threw at him anything that she could get her hands on.
She said she did not believe that her husband always had to work late hours and felt the only way to fix him was to deny him food and throw tantrums by verbally and physically abusing him.
To her, it did not matter that the same food that she denied her husband was bought by him. She bragged that the man did not even dare lift a finger at her as she poked him and hit him with all sorts of objects.
She said some women make men unrepentant by tolerating their behaviour. She said her man knows how far he can push her.
She said he does not even respond to her aggressive behaviour. She is convinced that he can never leave her regardless of how she treats him because the couple has been through thick and thin together.
An elderly woman who was in the salon advised her against such behaviour reminding her that once her husband walks away, he will never return, especially that he seems to be on the soft side.
However, she said he can never leave her because the man is nothing without her.
While listening to the conversation, I thought to myself that it is never right to take advantage of another human being. Yes, people make mistakes, but it is not right to treat the other as though he is nothing without you.
Apparently, people who rarely react, take drastic measures once they do so.
Even the woman who bragged that she throws anything at her husband needs to realise that one day she might throw something at him that will gravely injure him or even kill him.
Why should violence be a solution to a problem? If anything, creating such an environment only makes the situation worse.
I agree with the elderly woman that there are better ways of solving a problem than picking up knives, pots or shoes to throw at your partner.
When will we ever learn that violence does not pay?
Until next week;
Let’s keep in touch:
dkasote@daily-mail.co.zm



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