Gender Gender

Why should husband and wife compete?

Speak Out on Violence: DORIS KASOTE
LOVE is about feeling for your partner, love is about getting concerned when your partner is down and out, and love is about being happy for your partner when things are going well for them.
Love is not about being in competition with one another, it is not about feeling jealous when one is climbing the ladder. If one is on the road to prosperity, your partner should be on the sidelines to cheer you on instead of giving you negative energies.
I know of a couple who started a business together and the two were working well together. However, the one who was attracting clients to the company was the wife because of her artworks while the husband did more of the administrative work.
The company started small but was slowly growing and it was clearly headed for bigger and better things. Along the way, the husband began to feel uncomfortable with the attention that the wife was getting. To the world, it seemed the company was wholly owned by the wife, a perception he was not comfortable with.
Insecurity grew from the husband and he insisted that she should let it be known that she was running the company with him and not that it was solely owned by her. Regardless of her efforts to make it clear to prospective clients, they did not give much attention to the husband.
This eventually affected their marriage and no amount of assurances put the man to rest. The strain on their marriage was too much such that she decided to move out with the children. Her action blew the man off, especially that he was a controlling kind of husband.
He threatened to pull out his finances from the company if she did not return home but she could not imagine living under the same roof with a control freak. Seeing that she was adamant, he pulled out his finances, which shook the company, but it was quickly back on its feet because the woman managed to find investors to pump in money.
This infiltrated him even further because his wish was to see her fail. Without him in the picture, her company even grow to higher heights and he was green with envy.
After years of separation, she decided to file for divorce, a decision the man could not swallow. He began harassing her by stalking her and sending her nasty messages that she was a nobody before she met him. He believed if it wasn’t for him, she wouldn’t have excelled in life. He also threatened to ensure that he won custody of the children because he knew people in high places.
The divorce finally went through and the wife also won custody of the children. The court warned the man not to harass his now former wife because the law would catch up with him.
All in all, success in a home is not about outdoing each other. It’s about lifting each other’s strengths and learning how best it could work for the family.
Until next week, let’s keep in touch.
dkasote@daily-mail.co.zm



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