Gender Gender

We should not accept violence as a norm

Speak Out on Violence: DORIS KASOTE
A WIFE stabbing her husband or a husband stabbing his wife over unresolved disputes should not be accepted as a norm.
Such stories have been hitting headlines in the media for a while, but society should not embrace such acts as a way of life.
One wonders that when some people are angered, they are filled with so much fury that their only relief is to let it out by being abusive.
What causes one to be abusive? There are many and complex causes of violence, including the propensity to be violent and trigger to a violent act.
The propensity to be violent is a personal factor.
This kind of violence resides within the individual committing the act, whereas the trigger is a social factor, which resides outside the individual committing the act.
Some examples of triggers are alcohol consumption, violence in the media, overcrowding or a person being disrespected.
However, experts state that, with a few exceptions, triggers lead to violence only when the propensity to be violent also exists.
Thus, most people may get drunk without becoming violent, but some can become lethally dangerous when drunk.
Most people watch violent media without this triggering violent behaviour, but research shows that when someone brought up in a violent household watches violent media, they are more likely to act violently because they have the propensity.
A major factor in the development of the propensity to be violent is a lack of empathy. Empathy is a powerful antidote to violence.
When a child is born, that child is born with the capacity for empathy. However, whether this quality develops or not to become part of their make-up depends on what they learn from observing adult reactions to the pain or suffering of others.
Therefore, ensuring that children are cared for in a sensitive, nurturing way that develops empathy would be a huge contribution to preventing violence. Lack of empathy is a major cause of propensity to be violent.
Many people will try to blame domestic abuse on a variety of factors. And although these factors may increase the likelihood of domestic abuse, they are not the cause of domestic abuse.
Domestic abuse is a matter of choice for perpetrators. They choose to exert power and control over their victims.
Sometimes, people who are abusive towards their families or partners hail from families with no history of abuse. On the other hand, some families in which abuse occurs do not produce abusive men or women. The family is not the only formative influence on behaviour. This means blaming abuse on a person’s own experience can offer an excuse for it, but it denies the experiences of the majority of individual survivors of abuse who do not go on to abuse others.
Until next week, let’s keep in touch,
dkasote@daily-mail.co.zm

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