Gender Gender

No marriage is perfect, but embrace one another

Speak Out on Violence: DORIS KASOTE
WHEN I look at how long some couples have been together in marriage, it is admirable. This does not mean in any way that they have not had problems. Besides, there is no perfect marriage on this face of the earth. What matters is how the people involved tackle the challenges they are faced with.
This brings me to a man, whose wife walked out on him. Well, there are always two sides to a story, but according to the man, the woman blamed the failure of their marriage entirely on him. They say it takes two to tangle, so if both don’t make an effort to make it work, nothing good will come out of it.
The woman would complain to relatives over the man’s behaviour. Whenever the couple was counselled by family and friends, the woman would do most of the talking about how her husband was ill-treating her.
During the talks, the man, who is on the reserved side, would thoughtfully listen to his wife lament. Yes, he appreciated the advice that the couple would be given but at the end of it all, the ball was in their court.
Meetings became a norm in their marriage. But what the relatives did not know was that the woman, who was the loudest complainant, had her own clandestine moves only that the husband did not reveal. He was being eaten up inside.
Her marital affairs were an open secret to the husband but relatives labelled him as the bad guy. He had caught her many times with other men but he forgave her and started afresh.
The woman was a business-woman and her financier was one of her boyfriends. She eventually moved out of the home and her boyfriend started renting a house for her and even bought her a vehicle.
The man was depressed when she moved out. Besides having an affair himself, he did not expect his marriage to turn out the way it did. He was broken but the wife did not care about his feelings.
During the last attempt to try and salvage their marriage, the man felt he also had to give his side of the story. He opened up to relatives that he had on many occasions discovered that his wife had been cheating on him. Not expecting the man to speak out, the woman did not complain much during the last meeting and simply agreed that they go their separate ways.
He later discovered that her business was being funded by not one but three men. He was broken but he has picked up the pieces and moved on. He feels ridiculed in the eyes of many.
Until next week, let’s keep in touch.
dkasote@daily-mail.co.zm

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