Columnists

Money cannot buy love

THE Mukupas at their home.

How we met:
MIKE MUGALA, Lusaka
WHEN Lina Takaiza was a younger lady, her dream was to get married to a wealthy man, little did she know what life held for her.

Even when she met Lee Mukupa, now her husband, in 2003 in Matero township, she was still convinced that a better man would come along for her.
“I wanted to get married to a wealthy and good looking man, but as time went on, I began to realise that love and happiness are more important than anything.
But her perception, she says, changed when she saw how her parents looked after their children. She got convinced that love conquers all.
And when Lee disclosed to Lina that he wanted a relationship with her, she was still not sure and the response to his intentions only came a month later.
According to Lina, she thought Lee only wanted to use her and dump her later.
It took a month for me to respond because I was not sure what he wanted from me,” she said.
But when she accepted his request, some of her family members were against her decision and advised her to go for a rich man.
“I started liking him when we got into a relationship because I began to understand him, though some of my family members did not like him, I did not give up my love for him,” Lina said.
With time, she grew fond of him and always found a way of seeing him.
During the course of their courtship, Lina got pregnant and it was at this point that the future looked bleak because she began to doubt whether Lee had genuine intentions.
“I was confused and thought he would not marry me, but he assured me that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me and that he was still going to marry me.
“And when he proposed marriage in 2005, I was the happiest person and it was he when that I truly believed that he loved me,” she narrated.
Now with three children and 12 years of marriage, Lina believes that understanding is the cornerstone of any marriage.
Lina believes that marriage is the most beautiful thing that has ever happened in her life.
She believes that couples must always understand each other and communicate for a marriage to work.
Lina is of the view that people must learn to love their partners and not the possessions they have.
“Love is important, whether a man does not have a car, house or money, it doesn’t matter. Happiness is what a marriage must be composed of and not what someone has achieved,” she said.
And Lee says it was Lina’s humility that convinced him to propose marriage to her.
He only began to realise that she would make a good wife in the midst of their relationship.
“I wanted to get married to a humble and understanding woman and that I found in Lina, though it took time for me to begin to notice it. When I met her, I never thought we were going to stay together one day.” Lee explained.
For him, seeing Lina on a daily basis was another task he had each time he knocked off from work.
Lee believes that marriage changes people’s attitude and perception about life.
He is also of the view that marriage provides people with better opportunities in life.
“When I was single, I was only thinking about myself. Now, I think I am a totally changed person because of marriage. I now know the importance of a family and responsibilities that come with marriage,” Lee said.
He explained that Lina has changed his life and that he has found peace and comfort in marriage.
He said when one gets married, the hand of God reaches out to them and they become complete.
“I used to stay in a one-room house and only had a bed and television set. My life improved the moment I got married. I am living a comfortable life and have seen the hand of God in my marriage,” Lee said.
He learnt the most cardinal things in marriage are understanding, humility and love for each other.
Lee said his wife is a mother who is always there for him when he is going through challenges.
He advised that one must take their time before they decide to settle down in marriage.
“People must be serious when they meet someone they love, they also need to be committed to their partners.
Young people on the other hand must not experiment but wait for the right time because experimenting may cost one’s life,” Lee said.
The couple lives in Matero. Lee is into construction and car dealer while Lina is a businesswoman. 

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