How we met: CHRISTINE CHISHA, Lusaka
LOVE for God, trust and respect for each other have been key to the marital bliss of Patrick Siame and Lucy, who on April 23 this year will be celebrating 33 years of their union.
Despite having been married for a long time, the two still share jokes and fond memories of their courtship and marriage journey.
Patrick and Lucy met in Mufulira. During that time they were both members of the United Church of Zambia (UCZ).
Patrick said although they used to belong to the same church, they were not friends. Patrick used to be a choir member while Lucy was a member of the youth fellowship and a Boys’ Brigade officer.
The couple did not see each other for a while after completing secondary education and further went to Zambia National Services. Years later, the two met on a train to Lusaka, both were travelling to school with Patrick going to UNZA while Lucy was heading to Lusaka Nursing School.
Patrick said while on the train, they chatted briefly. This prompted Patrick to later pay Lucy a visit at the nursing school.
“When Patrick visited me, he was in the company of two friends. I recalled that I had a dream of the visit and God told me that one of the three would one day be my husband. I never suspected it could be Patrick because at the time, he was seeing somebody else,” she said.
Patrick said Lucy was not aware that he had broken up with his girlfriend because he discovered that the two were cousins.
When Patrick graduated from the University of Zambia, he started working for the Central Statistical Office (CSO), which is situated near the University Teaching Hospital. Coincidently, Lucy was a trainee nurse at the health institution and the two rekindled their relationship.
“We started attending the youth fellowship together at the UCZ Trinity congregation. Since we were spending time together, I again developed feelings for her and told myself this is the woman I would love to spend my entire life with. I proposed to her on our way to Mufulira when we were both going to visit our parents and she agreed,” Patrick said.
The couple dated for a year and a few months. On April 23, 1983 the couple tied the knot in their home town of Mufulira.
“We have enjoyed our journey. The Lord has been faithful and he has seen us through various challenges. We have been blessed with three children. We have also been blessed with three other children (niece and two nephews) who are orphans. They have lived with us for six years and we are now parents of six children and two grandchildren,” Lucy said.
She said over the years they have been married, they have developed a strong friendship. They support each other and give each other room to flourish in their respective talents.
For Patrick, being friends, loving and respecting each other have been a great treasure he has enjoyed in their 33 years of marriage.
Patrick said since the couple got married, they have been involved in pre-marital counselling.
“We have been counselling different couples from the time we got married. Even when we relocated to work in Swaziland under World Vision, it did not take long for the church to identify us and we became chairperson for the couples’ fellowship at the church we were attending,” he said.
Patrick said they have identified marriage counselling as their area of ministry. This has prompted the couple to develop a menu for marriage counselling together with their role models Mr and Mrs Siwale of Lusaka.
The couple said they have attended seminars and training on marriage counselling just to gain more knowledge to help young couples build strong marriages and they offer counselling sessions to couples for free.
The couple said when they got married, they identified a lot of gaps in the area of marriage counselling where at times counsellors would go to counsel a girl drunk and men are not taught.
Lucy said she had a bad experience of marriage counselling and when she married Patrick, they started helping young couples to build their marriages on Christian principles if the marriages had to survive.
“We always advise couples not to only prepare for a day of the wedding but prepare for a life -time commitment; young people should know that marriage is a life-long relationship and should put Christ at the centre of their marriage,” the couple said.
Patrick and Lucy draw their inspiration of what a good marriage is from Kebby Siame and his wife Ann.
The couple are members of Tabernacle of Praise, a member of Grace Ministries Mission International.