GODLY COUNSEL with PASTOR PHILLIP KATAI
Good morning pastor. I hope you are fine, I have a serious problem. I have two sons with different beautiful ladies. I want to marry one of them but I love them both. What should I do?
ANS: Brother, 1 Corinthians 13 vs 4 – 7 speaks about the virtues of Love – the type of love you have to offer will leave one woman as a single mother and the other one will be ever suspicious about any attention you may give to the other.
I am sure you had the opportunity to grow up in a home with both parents – how is it that you could so easily turn away from the mother of your child?
If you really love both ladies, you would not have found yourself in the current predicament. It is not love that you feel – turn to GOD with a humble heart, confess your selfishness and seek to be a real lover to these women – give them the moral and financial support to raise your children and endeavour to live your life by Christian principles.
Finally, in mine own view, I feel if you are to settle with one, you can go for the first woman but shoulder the burden of raising up the other child of the second woman. Blessings!
He just used to WhatsApp me without a call
I am a lady aged 21 and am dating a 27 year old man. The problem is that I am confused.
I had gone for studies and he just used to Whatsapp me without a call for a year, and now he is saying that he wants to engage me, tell me, what should I do? I love him very much.
ANS: My dear sister, thank you for your honesty. You have rightly discerned that communication is important in a relationship.
There is no two ways about it – if this man is serious about marriage there is no way he would only choose WhatsApp to communicate.
You may feel that you love him now, but your heart has already warned you of the dangers of entering into marriage with him.
Let him know that you need time to focus on school and that you would only be willing to talk about marriage later.
People usually do not change their character and there is no need for you to put yourself in a situation you will regret five years down the line. I advise you to wait for the man GOD has pre-destined for you. Blessings!
How can I know the right man for marriage?
I am a girl aged 20. How can I know the right man for marriage?
ANS: Sister thanks for your text. Finding the right man or woman to marry is not always an easy thing to do. Once you think you have found the right person, you may have doubts. Having doubts about who you are marrying is not only normal, but healthy.
I have a feeling within me that you would not want to marry someone who drinks too much, spends too much, works too much, brags too much, uses drugs or other illegal behaviour, has been unfaithful, cruel, dishonest or abusive.
If your man is free of these destructive behaviours and you are still having doubts about getting married, look at the following suggestions.
The right person will want you to be emotionally healthy and able to stand on your own two feet. When you are with the right person you will feel good about yourself, safe, and fulfilled.
The right person will not be negative, selfish, wishy-washy, silent, embarrassing, critical, or a slob. Why spend your life with a twitch?
Having different likes and different opinions is fine as long as the two of you agree to disagree. Although you may not always agree with one another, conversations with the right person will be interesting and not boring.
The right person will communicate thoughts and feelings with you and will not keep hurts and concerns bottled up inside.
The right person will trust you and not spy on you. Feeling as if you have to justify your every move will become a very heavy burden.
I am a lady aged 28, looking for a serious friend between the age of 35-90. 0977-944045.
I am a single lady aged 27 and no child looking for a serious man with a stable job. Contact 0960-971989.
I am a divorcee, aged 50 looking for a dark or brown fat, very mature and beautiful lady aged 35-45, a teacher, nurse, Police officer or any one in civil service to marry. Those interested contact me on 0967-629355.
I am a single man aged 32 looking for a single teacher or nurse within Kafue. Contact 0954-730033.
I am man aged 35 looking for a working class woman with child or none aged 22-31 and Christian. Contact 0978-337632.
I am a lady aged 31 looking for a serious man who is HIV positive. Contact 0950-929931.
I am a man aged 27 looking for a serious lady who is single aged 21-25. Call 0954-091392.
I am a man aged 25 with 2 children looking for a woman to marry who can accept my children, God fearing aged 19-24. Call 0968-077842, Lusaka.
Tip of the week
Marriage: The right person will trust you and not spy on you. Blessings!
More answers in the next edition and ensure you get a copy every Sunday. Meanwhile let’s continue interacting via email email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org or sms 0967/0955-778068. Emailing is encouraged for quick response.