Couples Life and Style

‘My fiancée has HIV, how do I tell my parents?’

GODLY COUNSEL with EVANGELIST KATAI

Hi Pastor,
I am a Fourth year student in the school of law, dating someone who is HIV+.We have dated for four years and I love her so much and I want to marry her. The problem is how do I tell my parents that she is HIV+? She has been there since that day and told me her status before we started dating. Please help me pastor.
ANS: Brother thanks for your text. HEALTH matters are usually very personal, couples often wait for a certain period before they disclose a pregnancy. You have been aware of your partner’s HIV status for quite some time and I believe you have received counselling and are aware of the various methods that can be used to protect yourself from HIV infection. If not, you can call 990 for advice from any phone network.
My personal belief is that the HIV status of your partner need not be a talking point of your planned union. Your family will instantly react with fear – which is understandable and nobody would want to see their child or sibling enter into a difficult situation. However, I can understand and respect your wish to share this information with your family. I would advise you to speak with a trusted elder first, and get their advice on to how to proceed.  Blessings!
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Pastor,
I am girl aged 17 and I have four boyfriends in different areas. The problem is that I love them all and I do not know who to choose. They are all single but it is affecting my studies. What Should I do?
ANS:  Little sis thanks for your text. Your problem is not love, in fact you are a problem yourself. At your age, how can you have four boyfriends? Why and for what if I may ask you? In this column have always advised youngsters of your age to put off the love thing to a later stage in life and concentrate on school.  In your predicament, you do not need to choose any of those boyfriends, call it quits now. As I am writing now, please leave them all and get back to serious studying and build yourself a strong foundation for your future. Education has proved to be a great and promising investment. Blessings!
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Hi Pastor,
I am a lady aged 26 unhappily married to the father of my two children but at the same time I am truly in love with another man who has impregnated me. My husband believes it is his pregnancy and all I want to abort and leave the two men and move on with my life because I am tired of this dirt life. I just want an independent life and live with my children. Please help me.
ANS: Thanks for your text. I was at pains to find a standpoint, where to start from. Friend you have not talked about marital problems except exposing yourself –
despite being in marriage you crossed the borders of your home to outsource sex from another man who is not legally your husband. I find your behaviour to be disappointing as a married woman. You have committed adultery. Two wrongs do not make a right. Now you are talking of aborting, what a decision to take lady! Abortion is not only a health risk; it is sin in the eyes of God and illegal under our Zambian laws. What is the problem with your current husband? Is your marriage beyond redemption even with the help of your local church, or elders in both families? Rescind your decision and come back to your senses, humble yourself and make peace with your husband. Forget about the intruder and concentrate on rebuilding your marriage – you hold the key to a successful marriage. Be wise lady! ( Proverbs 14:1).
Blessings!
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Hi Evangelist,
I am a man aged 23 in a serious relationship with the woman of the same age. I really love her and she does love me too. Now my fear is she may not respect me if I marry her because we are the same age. But for now she respects me. Help! what shall I do? Kindly advise , can we get married?
ANS: Thanks brother for your text. Should you get married to the woman of the same age? Yes Sir.  If a lady is well cultured and prepared for marriage, age should not be a stumbling block between the two of you. Who said it is age that makes one to respect the other? It is not about age, but one’s character and how one was brought up – mentored by parents. I believe you heard before of a youngster insulting an elderly person, therefore it does not hinge on the age of a person but discipline and character. Go right ahead and build that budding relationship. Blessings!
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Hi Pastor,
I am a man aged 37 looking for a serious God fearing lady to marry in stable employment or from college. Sms your details to 0966-272212.
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Hi Pastor,
I am a lady aged 25 looking for a serious man aged 37-40 who is HIV+ and Christian. I have a son aged 2. Interested?  Call 0950-521676.
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Hi Pastor,
I am a man with three children looking for a serious relationship with a lady aged between 30 and 40. Interested?  Call 0977-422674.
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Hi Pastor,
I am a single parent with three children looking for a God fearing woman in stable employment. Only serious ladies call 0953-725256
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Hi Pastor,
I am a single man aged 29 looking for a serious single lady aged between 22 and 26 who goes to church. If interested call 0979-239844
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Tip of the week
Marriage:  “The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down”. (Proverb 14:1, NIV).
More answers in the next edition and ensure you get a copy every Sunday. Meanwhile let’s continue interacting via email pkatai@yahoo.com or thabokatai@gmail.com or sms 0967/0955-778068.






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